Im satired of taxes

In lieu of the recent tax day headaches, many of you guys may undoubtedly have experienced, we at generation aptathy currently do not suffer at the hands of the tax man, but it does not mean we do not empathize with our readers whose day is made frustrating through the unintelligible tax code the US possesses. So for our readers I mock filled a 1040 and it goes something like this...

name: Charlie
DOB: Old enough to drink
Personal Income: I have a paradoxical enjoyment of the progressive tax code here...
Number of dependents: hmmm..contraceptives=$2...illegitimate children=$500 per...invest for the future here
Employer- where's my job, Obama?!
Deductions: If i could find all those happy hour receipts now....
Contraceptives- Does the gov't really want more of us around?
Taxi Cabs- I do my part, "buzzed driving is drunk driving" according to the gov't, this should be deductible
Newspapers- Its a dying industry that your (Obama, Again) undoubtedly going to bail out.

And now that another tax day has gone by and you get to wonderfully see a substantial amount of your income being given out to the old people, the poor people, and to the children, remember that taxes is the American way. Rather we wouldn't have such a lovely nation, if our forefathers had not complained about their taxes. So for all you working people out there, keep on it. I one day will look into some child's eye and say...$2 dollars deductible and $500 tax refund in the same fiscal year...what a great country.